The ninth commandment tells us, “Do not bear false witness against your neighbor.” This command means that we should not lie. A lie is any intention to deceive, it is much more than a spoken untruth. It can be practiced by a word or even by total silence. Bearing false witness against your neighbor is any expression of insincerity and untruthfulness with the motive to deceive which God hates. It is practiced because of malice and pride.
When and why do we lie?
A major reason why we lie is because of fear. We fear being disliked by others. We fear the consequences of something we have done. We fear being found out for doing something wrong so we deny that we were involved. Remember Peter, the apostle, in fear, he denied Jesus three times. Each denial was a lie. Peter feared that the Roman soldiers would persecute him. When Pharaoh took a liking for Sarai, the wife of Abram, Abram lied to Pharaoh and told him she was his sister because he feared for his life. Those are a few examples of lying because of fear in suffering the consequences. Honest confession is the quickest way to put ourselves back under the loving care of God.Another way we fall into the trap of lying is by boasting or exaggerating. In exaggerating we enlarge a matter beyond truth. Very few of us can resist the temptation to tell others about a personal experience, changing the facts in such a way that puts us in a better light. We tend to make ourselves a little bit more respectable than we really are.
Sometimes we withhold information that is vital to the whole truth. Silence is not always golden; sometimes it is sinful. If you know of someone who is accused of some wrongdoing, and you know him to be innocent or guilty and yet remain silent, you have become a false witness against him.
Speaking the truth in Love
To build healthy relationships, you need these five words: “Speaking the truth in love” You cannot love and not tell the truth. The Apostle Paul wrote that as we speak the truth in love, we can grow in faith and build relationships. Ephesians 4:15-16 says, “Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into Him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From Him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.”Love and truth are like oil and vinegar. Oil mixed with vinegar makes a delectable Italian dressing for a salad. If you only put vinegar or only oil in you salad, it will taste awful. Vinegar represents the truth and oil represents love. Together, they are life building combination for our relationships. One without the other can create a lot of serious problems.
If you are a “Truth-er”, you are likely to speak the “vinegar” of the truth without the oil of love. Pray therefore that God will empower you to add a perfect blend of love in the truth that you speak. If you are the “Lover” like oil, you may have the tendency to speak love but at the expense of the truth. An example of this is when you refuse to confront or you delay or bury the issues. Pray for God to lead you to confront problems as you speak in love.
The tongue is powerful; you cannot tame it (James 3:8). Death and life are in your tongue (Proverbs 18:21), coming from the abundance of your heart (Luke 6:45). Therefore seek the Lord to guard your mouth (Psalm 141:3). Get rid of sinful lips and ask God to create in you a new heart (Psalm 51:10). You are not doing this for yourself or to please men, but all for God’s glory.
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